Both you and your partner are aware of how much you value one another. You also understand how to build the connections you want and how to argue well (or at least how to practice!). Why then does the same discussion keep coming up time and time again? You are familiar with the battle that never stops, especially when one or both of you are under stress. They might be causing you trouble because you’re constantly on the phone or because your partner keeps forgetting to get to the supermarket. Whether it’s a minor argument or a large conflict, it prevents you from supporting, supporting, and being as joyful as you can be together. Lack of communication is the root of many marital issues, but particular conflicts can cause enduring resentment if you or your partner don’t feel heard or cared about. Even if it seems foolish, have a formal meeting with each other to discuss any problems. A recipe for misunderstanding and feeling ignored is attempting to express wounded sentiments before going to bed or bringing up other issues when your partner forgets to unload the dishes. Set aside some time to talk about how you’ve been feeling over the past week. Put your phone away. When possible, give each other a chance to speak; if this proves challenging without escalating into an argument, consider discussing the argument in a public setting, such as a park or café. The fact that your partner “never” cleans the dishwasher or that they have taken out the trash three times in a row while you keep forgetting to do it at least once has certainly caused arguments between you two. It’s possible that a few tears were shed over an empty toothpaste tube at ten in the evening or a trip to the store that was neglected in order to buy milk for the next morning’s breakfast. Divide household duties equally whether one of you works outside the home or both of you do in order to prevent conflict (or several).
